For people who knows me rather well would have known that I'm not a very positive person. I complain a lot and get upset easily. Some tiny little thing can just piss me off or make me really sad for the entire day. And sometimes I can just emo the whole day for no particular reason.
I think I spend about 1/3 of the time per day just complaining about things, saying mean things about others, cursing and swearing, crying over useless stuff (sometimes!). Of course I don't go on and on about these to my friends. Umm..... I spend a lot of time talking to myself, so its kind of like split personality. (LOL)
And I do think that by talking to myself, it makes me feel more unhappy and -ve .
But well, all these are coming to an end, because I've decided to take the first step to changing myself into a better person. For myself, and also the people around me. ^^
So....
Step 1: Vulgarities.
I was a girl who speaks with vulgarities in almost every sentence that I spoke, and I text.blog.tweet in really short short forms which I, myself cannot understand when I read back these days. But then I decided to change the way I text.blog.tweet few years back. I started to spell my words properly, and stopped cursing (for a period of time), and realised that I became less violent.
But then, I feel that I'm becoming more vulgar these few months, so I hope to correct this thingthing of mine.
Step 2: Rant time.
I spent hours and hours getting complaining and getting myself upset for very minor reasons everyday... I'm getting really sick and tired of being upset and grumpy all the time. So I'll be trying to like control my temper and stuff. Set aside some time to reflect on my day like why I felt upset over things, vent all my anger and let any tears that I've been holding back all during that short span of time. (target: 30min)
Not really sure if this will work, but I'm planning to shorten the 'grumpy time' if things do turn out better.
After 'Grumpy time' will be cheerful time. Hopefully I'll be able to piece myself back together quickly...
Positive positive positive, just want to stop looking at things negatively.
Okayyy, I shall stop here today.. We'll see how things go and if there is a need for more steps. Meanwhile, I shall just focus on these two steps!
Study break starts tomorrow. Few more days left to mug. And I'm definitely going complain complain and complain about how limited time I have left. But well, I can only put the blame on myself.
Just don't want to carry another module with me to the next semester......
GYY, hwaiting!
(L),
Yuyin